the one about Quayd

So, I am going to copy cat Kandice and dedicate an entire days worth of blogging to the people that I love the most. Don't be offended if you don't see your name right away (Ma) it will just depend on my mood and what ever experiences I had with that person.

I have kind of been a baby lately. I am just over emotional and have been a little freaky lately. I know that I can't have anymore babies and 94% of the time, I am fine with it. But occasionally I struggle. I am always CRAZY excited and happy for my friends having babies. I never get upset about that stuff. I promise. But I just get a little sad sometimes. I do the "Why me?" and the "It's not fair" thing about 6% of the time. Anyway, I get emotional and sentimental with every one of Quayd's milestones. Every Birthday is hard on me. I just get a little sad to think that he is growing so fast. He is becoming so independent and smart. Several things happened this summer that really hit me hard. Such as; saying good bye to the training wheels and riding a two wheel bike. He doesn't like his "baby toys" anymore, now he is into action figures and scary stuff. He prepared for Kindergarten. He learned all of his letters and numbers and is starting to read. He turned 5. He is better on the computer than I am. He spent the night, THE WHOLE NIGHT, at a friends house. Anyway, just stuff like that. He just grew up too much this summer. He is not only 5, but he is a mature 5 year old. I just can't believe it is going so fast. I miss my baby boy, but I also LOVE watching him get older. I really dreaded Kindergarten, but, surprise, I kinda love it. This is such a fun stage. He is making friends and learning so much. I love working with him everyday on his reading, helping him with his homework and just sitting down and discussing the days events. He is so special. I wish I could write all of the amazing things he says and does.

When Brett's Dad died, Quayd was very upset. He will be the only grandchild that will remember his Grandpa. They had a very special relationship. Quayd was definately Papa's boy. We tried to explain it all to him the best we could, but it broke our hearts when he cried and said he missed his Papa. At the funeral, when we closed the casket, we all walked up, kissed Mike and told him good-bye. Quayd was nervous to touch him, but finally did, right at the end. As we had the family prayer, Quayd just started to sob. While we walked into the Chapel, I carried him as he cried and I think the whole room cried with him as they saw his sad face. He talked for days about the Resurrection and asked if Papa would come back to life in 3 days like Jesus did. He also told us that now Papa is perfect and that he is singing with the angels. What 5 year old thinks of this stuff? At his Primary Program, he told us he thinks he got Papa's beautiful singing voice and that he thinks he was there listening to him. As Halloween approaches, he was very concerned about Papa not having a pumpkin, so we took one to his grave. Quayd sat right down and started talking to his Papa like he was just sitting right there. And he probably was. What an amazing kid.

Quayd has so many friends. He and Brennen are great buddies, but they fight a lot. When they get mad at each other, Quayd will be devastated, but Brennen just goes on his merry little way, unphased. It breaks Quayd's heart. That is the kind of person he is. But it's so funny, when he gets really mad at Brennen, he tells him that he wants to break up with him! I actually think they are broken up right now.

A couple weeks ago, we invited Gleneita over for dinner. Before she got there, Quayd told me that when he gets big, I can come over to his house for dinner anytime I want. "You don't even have to ask," he told me. Then he said, "I won't mind, and neither will Taylor." Cute huh!

He had a friend, Drake, spend the night last night. They played and played and had so much fun, but when it came time to go to sleep, he wanted to sleep in his bed. His bed is on mom and dad's floor. (Yes, I am a sucker!) We told him that he needed to sleep in his bed we made for them in the living room, or else Drake would be sad. Quayd was just so emotional. Finally, Drake went to sleep and so did Brett. I was waiting for Quayd to drift off before I could relax. About 11:00 Quayd came into my room and cried to me. He asked if I could just come in the living room with him for a minute. I agreed. When I got in there, he asked me to rock him in my chair. (I am kind of tearing up right now telling this story.) He climbed up on my lap and I rocked him to sleep. And I cried. And I cried some more. My baby boy still needs me! He still depends on me and sometimes he wants me to rock him to sleep. I just sat and stared at him, crying, like I used to when he was tiny. I kissed him all over and told him I loved him and I prayed to Heavenly Father, thanking him for sending me this special boy. Although he went to sleep almost instantly, I stayed up until 1:00 rocking him. It was one of the most amazing nights.

These are just a few of the special things about Quayd that I cherish. I don't know how I got so lucky. He is amazing. Brett and I joke that Quayd is what happens when 2 wrongs make a right! It's true. We don't deserve such a great kid. I guess Heavenly Father knew that we were idiots and that we needed a good one to teach us and keep us on the right path. I think I mentioned before that I print my blog entries and keep them in my journal. So Quayd, someday whe you are reading this, please know how much I love you. You are the most amazing person in the world. Thanks you for everything you have taught me so far. I can't wait to watch you grow some more. But please, don't forget, Mommy is ALWAYS here to rock you to sleep. I love you baby boy!